My mother asks me on the phone every morning, "So, what is Kavya doing now?" And of course the answer is generally, "Umm...the same thing as yesterday?" She eats, she sleeps, she cries, she pees and poops. That's mostly it.
But there are small things she does. Like making a little 'eh eh eh' sound, that Kevin and I find charming, and really ought to record before she stops making it. She also sometimes flails her head violently from right to left a few times just before sucking on a bottle or breast, which makes us laugh. When Kavi's hungry, she tries to root for food on Kevin's neck, or chest, or stomach, all of which attempts are pretty funny. Nice try, baby, but there is nothing there to eat! Once in a while, she blows little spit bubbles. Very cute.
And sometimes she does new things. Yesterday, we had her on her stomach for a bit, and she held her head up for close to a minute -- she's not supposed to be able to do that yet. It was exciting. And even more exciting -- she's getting a lot better at nursing! Starting a few days ago, she began pretty consistently latching on and sucking when offered the breast, and for much of yesterday, when she did that, she'd then stay on, generally fairly calmly, for a long time! We are proud of her -- look, you've figured out how to eat! What a good girl! (Yes, we actually say such things out loud, in proud, parental tones. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.)
Not that we're done worrying. For one thing, she has a marked preference for the right breast over the left -- the left (which has a much flatter nipple) still triggers howls of frustration pretty quickly. We're working on it. For another, I'm finding that now that I can't count how many ounces she's getting for certain, I'm pretty anxious about whether she's eating enough. If she sucks for fifteen minutes, can I assume that she's getting the same three ounces that I would have pumped in that time? And if she eventually gets tired and frustrated and starts howling, but clearly wants more food, which we give her from the bottle, does that mean that maybe the breast was mostly empty and she didn't actually get very much? I don't know! It's very confusing. I wish my breasts were transparent, so I could actually see what was going on.
Kavya has her one-month pediatrician appointment tomorrow, so we can ask some of these questions then, and they'll weigh her and tell us whether she's gaining enough weight or not. And obsessive parental anxieties aside, it's all probably fine. I do know that. If we end up only nursing half the time and pumping the rest, it's still a big improvement.
Right now, after a fretful morning, she's finally sleeping peacefully, and I'm going to go back to reading the Eliot baby psych/physiology book. It's good -- so far, the most interesting parenting book I've come across. I admit to skimming the science bits, but the summaries at the end of each section are full of useful, concrete parenting advice. Which mostly seems to add up to 'pay lots of attention to her, and she will be a healthy, happy child.' Okie doke. We can do that for the next eighteen years, right?
One month down. Two hundred fifteen to go. :-)