I can afford to be a little flip about this 'cause the break-up with Kevin didn't stick. Eight hours and a lot of talking later, we got back together. Sometimes I think that if I really want to break up with that man I'll need to send him a telegram from a foreign country -- and then stay away for three years.
Anyway, I'm telling you this because I was going to include some cryptic reference to it in here for my own personal reference -- maybe a poem or some such, but I'm not really in a mood to write a poem, and I just decided what the hell. It's not as if you didn't know we were involved.
Things are still not entirely settled, but we're probably sticking together for the next six months at least. Many dicussions ahead. It should be interesting.
That's something, anyway. In almost seven years with this man, I've never been bored.
Okay -- enough on the subject. Other trivia -- I've managed to delete the January 1998 entries through my own stupidity. I *think* I have a backup. I'm going to go hunting as soon as I have breakfast. I also think Jed and I have probably managed to get the automatic diary update list working. You may have missed a notice for the last entry or two, so you may want to check back.
I'm listening to Tori Amos and trying not to be overwhelmed by how much I have to do. The most critical thing is to find a job. The money situation is going to get slightly drastic soon, and I really don't want to borrow any more from friends. I could make lists of things to do, but I think that'd be even more stressful. I think I'll just go shower and eat something. That's probably more likely to help.
I did have a great New Year's Eve, btw. Went to Peg and Barb's party (friends from Chicago who recently moved here) with Sherman and had a tremendous time. Saw lots of old friends, some of whom have moved out here, some who had flown out for the party. Was startled, again, at how much older P&B's kids are. Natalie's going to be absolutely stunning in a few years. Smart munchkins too. The next day, several of the Chicago people came over for pizza and games and hanging out. Really fun, even if it is a bit disconcerting realizing that Mort is really and truly married now. His wife is very nice, though. :-)
Then went down to the South Bay, saw _Raising Somebody or Other_, an Irish movie with gorgeous accents. Fun and funny, if a little random. Borrowed Susan's copy of _Franny and Zooey_ by Salinger, which I hadn't read before and which I liked extraordinarily, much more than _Catcher in the Rye_. His voices are incredible. And they actually have something worth saying...
The next day was mostly arguing and weeping. Glad that's over. We did pause at one point and go out for Ethiopian food. There's only so long that my stomach will let me skip meals, no matter how miserable I am. It was good, too. I'm going to have some leftovers for breakfast in a bit.
I imagine I've procrastinated long enough. Hope y'all are having a better week than I am...
10:25 a.m. Noting a couple of errors in the journal updates. Could the owners of the addresses that are probably something like: firstname.lastname@example.org, and Hub.Schoenmaekers@nl.origin-it please drop me a line with their correct addresses? Thanks.
10:15 p.m. Did some job hunting. Watched a movie (recent version of Great Expectations, which I think did a reasonable job with a difficult task, updating Dickens). Lit a lot of candles. Drank some tea. Wrote a poem.
Spinning DownIt's dark again, and we have searched for quite
some time for that still center, that space
where you and I can co-exist. Your face
these days is hard to bear, your eyes so bright...
I've filled my room with candles, to keep the night
away. I'll step to a more measured pace;
resist the fruitless urge to simply race
in spinning endless circles, locked in might-
have-beens. Speed will not save us. So brace
yourself -- it's time to slow things down. Hold tight
to what you know. The fragile tree of light
you gave to me -- the still and shining lace
of silver branches, falling glass. Its slight
geometry holds something true, and right.