Morning, everyone. Rain…

Morning, everyone. Rain again, which I'm enjoying from inside but which also makes me decidedly unenthusiastic about going to campus in (where I would scan in those photos from Yosemite). Maybe I'll feel more motivated later; it's coming down pretty hard...

Bach toccatas and fugues on the stereo today; thoroughly appropriate for the rain. I do feel a bit like I'm trapped within Phantom of the Opera. :-)


rather than tell you how i love you,
again, let me simply and softly whisper
in your ear -- the rain makes me long to be
near you, long to be against your skin,
surrounding you, long to be kissing your neck,
over and over and over again. rain knows that
none of my other lovers cry out so sweetly
gorgeous, under an assault of wet kisses...

I'm afraid you'll probably see lots of scraps of poetry and writing here for a while, at least until I figure out what major project I'll be working on next. Maiden Voyage is off at the publisher's, being read by Richard -- hope he likes it. The thesis is nominally done, and though the creative nonfiction certainly needs to be reworked and incorporated and the whole made into a book, I'm not quite ready to face that yet. I have an idea for a novel, but the idea of starting a novel terrifies me. As for short stories; well, if any exciting anthology calls come around, I'll probably take a stab at some, but right now, I have a ton I just need to market properly (and plenty others to revise). Maybe that'll be my project for the next few weeks...working through the stacks of revision to be done. Oh, and finding a job -- mustn't forget that. :-)

Tonight is Kaylie's last night with us -- she'll be going down to live with her dad and sister for the next year, while Lydia finishes her degree. Lyd knows she's doing the right thing, but it's clearly wrenching her apart, the thought of being without her girls for a whole year...poor chica. This is not what she was planning for when she got married...or probably when she got divorced. I wonder how stable any of those plans really are. We so badly want something we can count on in this life; someone we can rely on...

I got a wedding invitation in the mail this morning, from my friend Kathy S. I haven't talked to Kathy in a few years, so I'm not sure how she found my address, but I'm very glad she did, even though I can't afford to attend the wedding. Kath is my oldest friend. In kindergarten, the tallest girl in the class (Kathy eventually grew to be 6 foot something, and play center on the basketball team) befriended the weirdo Asian kid who even then spent most of her time reading. I was the only South Asian in the whole school until my sisters came along, five and nine years later; I grew up in a predominantly Polish Catholic neighborhood (my family is Catholic, which is why I was in the school to begin with), surrounded by a sea of white faces. I even studied Polish with the rest of them for four years in grammar school; it's unfortunate that all I remember is the sign of the cross, and counting to one hundred, and a few Christmas carols. I *was* semi-fluent once; my second lost language (I've mostly forgotten Tamil at this point, though I still understand my parents when they speak it, and my Spanish is rapidly disappearing...sigh). If it hadn't been for Kathy (and later on Marta and Karen and David), I could have easily been the most miserable, picked-on kid in the school. I didn't figure out how lucky I was in that regard until much later, though...

I'm really glad Kathy's getting married, though I don't know this Robert boy she's marrying, and so reserve the right to come and beat him if he doesn't treat her right. There were times in late grammar school when she thought no boy would want to date a 'beanpole', but I always had a feeling that she'd end up living happily ever after. Her wedding invitation had a castle on it, and a carriage pulling up to it, and the words, "Dreams do come true..." *smile* Very Kathy. I think marriage will suit her...

One of these days I'll probably type up a long rant about marriage, but not today; I'm in too good a mood. I wanted to write *something* about Heather's latest journal entry, but I can't think what to say. Oh well; at least she knows I'm thinking about it. :-)

Talk to y'all later...

11:30. Y'know, I really lost track of the dates. My Mills account dies on Sunday, which means that I need to scramble to get a new primary email account. It'll probably be -- I'll let you know when that's confirmed. In the interim, urgent mail can reach me at

Now, can someone remind me what UNIX command does a search and replace through all my files here? I need to replace with -- and will need to do it again once the new account is active.

If you can also remind me how to use tar to compress and save my entire account at Mills, so I can ftp it to the new account and uncompress it, that would help. Kevin left me instructions, but they don't seem to be working. :( When I tried:

(tar -cvf ella *) it seemed to work fine, but (tar -xvf ella *) gave me error messages. :(

Kev's away at a conference; meep.

5:00 - Okay, John and Brian have figured out what I was doing wrong with the tar stuff; they're still figuring out how to do the search and replace in a C shell. I know y'all were dying to know that. :-)

Making cheesecake and cake for Kayie's going away party -- must get back to it!

1:15 a.m. -- Okay, technically it's probably Saturday, but since I haven't gone to sleep yet, we'll stay here for now.

Raucous party. Take one small child (age 8), six adults intent on making sure she has a good time, one frosted cake, two cheesecakes, some fruit and chocolate, ice cream, sorbet, and soda (and a little port), many balloons and the cushions from the couch (ideal for starting pillow fights), and you can have a really good time. :-) It was fairly tame for the first chunk of it, until Kaylie started agitating for a party game. Well, no one indulged her right away, but a little later, she was sitting on her mom's lap while Lydia talked to Ian and El, and well, once I thought of it, I *had* to do it, right? Right?

So I ran over, tagged Lydia's knee, and shouted, "You're It!" Lydia just gave me this *look*...and then she was moving the small child and moving herself, fast! I was dragging off my socks so I wouldn't slip on the hardwood floor, and then I took off into the back yard with Kaylie right behind me, and rampaging chaos in the living room. David mostly stayed out of it (in fact, the one time I remember him being tagged, he just stood there until Ian came up to him and said, 'okay, okay, tag *me*'), but the rest of us shrieked and ran and made up rules to games we didn't quite remember (Freeze Tag; TV Tag; etc.) until we were utterly exhausted. Kaylie had more energy than any of us (and honestly, I think she had less sugar than any of us).

Other highlights of the evening including David as weary old horse (I think he eventually died under a disappointed Kaylie) and Ian as bucking bronco -- she held on really tight! Oh, and later there was a pillow fight, and a game of Statues (make the other person laugh) and after I awarded Kaylie the keychain water pistol award (functional!) for longest as a statue, she and Ian got into a rather messy waterfight, with many soaked innocent bystanders (I think El got it the worst). Eventually the munchkin fell asleep on the couch, after Heather and I sang a couple songs to her, but she wore us out first!

I'm still oddly awake (I kind of fell asleep on her shoulder for a bit, actually), which is why I'm writing this now, but I should probably go to sleep. 'Night, everyone.

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