Hey, kiddos. Hope…

Hey, kiddos. Hope you're having a good week. Mine is finally calming down; the most exciting thing I did today was make gingerbread cookie ornaments to hang on the tree. (Had a horrible time with it too, actually; I'm just not doing something right with refrigerator cookies; despite chilling, they stay goopy unless I add a whole bunch more flour. Took me forever to get usable cookies out of that batch of dough. Hopefully the molasses crisps I'm making tomorrow will be easier.)

I did watch a surprisingly charming movie, "My Best Friend's Wedding". I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about it -- it really surprised me. I don't want to say too much, in case some of you haven't seen it yet and wanted to, so I'll just say that I'm a bit surprised Hollywood got away with it. Oh, and it's got one of the best editors in the world in this movie. All editors should watch it and take notes. Publishers too. Hear that, Cecelia? Dale?

By the way, for those who were worried about me after the rather downer of an entry last week, I'm doing a fair bit better. Academics being done for a month and a half is a big help. :-) And I'm slowly getting my other work done. Still to do, hopefully before I leave for Xmas:

  • finish transcribing Carol interview
  • push on book to 20K words
  • revise "Amanda Means Love"
  • finish reading through submissions
  • finish decorating house for party
  • get rum cake recipe from Roshani
  • bake cookies, cakes and pies
  • Fed Ex article to Puritan
It looks like a lot, but I've got some time to do it in. I think it'll be okay. I'm going to run (I owe 'shani a phone call), but I'll leave you with this bit of interesting semi-factoid. Don't ask me whether it's a true story or not; it just got passed on to me...

"Had the most interesting conversation with the top sales weasel at our company today. She came into my office and noticed I had a box of Altoids on my desk.(Have you had them? They are these obnoxiously strong peppermints made in England.) As soon as she saw them, she burst into laughter. Turns out she had recently had an affair with a guy who called her and left her an incredibly steamy voice mail message after an encounter. He went on and on about what a blow job goddess she was, how amazing she was, how he'd never be the same, etc. She was kind of puzzled, thinking: what did I do to this guy that was so different from my regular technique?

She finally figured it out: she's a smoker, and before getting intimate with him, she had gone to the bathroom to "freshen up." Not having a toothbrush, she crunched on about four Altoids and then got busy. Apparently things went amazingly.

So she passed this little tidbit on to another female sales weasel, who immediately tried it out on *her* fiance. Apparently this guy has never, ever been into oral sex, but liked the mint sensation so much that he asked her to stop and chew another Altoid mid-blow job. He is now a fellatio gourmand.

This news has been going around our office. Having a box of Altoids on your desk is now like being part of the Secret Blowjob Goddess Society [SBJGS]. It's the equivalent of having the hottest car or coolest computer. News spread like crazy among the females, who all went out at lunch to Walgreens to buy a box of Altoids (about $2 for 100 or so), and their partners across the city tonight are getting one hell of a corporate blow job. As far as company-wide morale boosting events, it doesn't get much better.

Some of the men found out, too -- they went out after work to buy them for their wives. They strategized on how to get their wives to eat them. And people wonder why I work in technology.

(For what it's worth -- it really does work! It leaves a lasting tingle that is apparently quite exquisite.)"

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