Since I'm only going for three days, I'm not going to bother taking the stroller. There'll be so many relatives wanting to hold her once we get there, I don't think we'll be taking so many walks. So Kev will drive me to the airport, and we'll check the infant seat when we get there and transfer her to the moby sling. (Which I assume I can just wear through security? It has no metal parts.) I'm a bit worried that this means that I won't be able to put her down anywhere, but it's a short flight to CT, so it should be okay. (And yes, I can use the toilet with her in the sling. :-)
I will pack to carry with me on the plane: two bottles of pumped breast milk, in normal bottles, trusting that they know the regulations allow it; one packet of dry formula, just in case they don't, or in case we get stuck on the runway for eight hours; one change of top for me; one change of clothes for her; receiving blanket, pacifier; diapers and wipes and a few plastic bags for disposal. I will probably also have my pump with me, just out of paranoia, but will not expect to use it. (Hmm...all of this won't fit in my sleek Essentials diaper bag -- I guess I can use a backpack. Or maybe this is an excuse to buy an additional pretty diaper bag. :-)
I expect that my breasts will get swollen and uncomfortable (since it'll be at least six hours from pumping at home to pumping at my parents' house), but with some breast pads to control leakage, I should be able to cope. I'll try to nurse her or feed her a bottle at takeoff or landing, but a pediatrician told a friend of mine that babies this small don't usually have trouble with air pressure -- a small blessing!
I'll pack whatever fits in my luggage, and plan to buy diapers, etc. as needed when I get there. But I'm adding one more item to my luggage -- a boppy, which will probably take up at least half the space in my little rolling suitcase. It seems a little silly, but she and I are both used to her nursing on it, and given all the trouble she has with nursing already, I don't want to disrupt our routine any futher.
Thanks so much for all the advice! Still nervous, but I think I can cope now.