As the kids get older and are off with their friends a lot of the time, Kevin and I are starting to think about how we’ll be spending our free time. It’s a little tricky, because ADHD me likes doing all sorts of things, with plenty of novelty, and Kevin…well, Kevin doesn’t have ADHD. 
So far (after 30+ years together), we’ve figured out that we both like:
– watching TV together (currently watching together: Strange New Worlds (that crossover episode made me laugh harder than anything has in a long time), Wynona (sort of Buffy in the Wild West), and Breeders (which we thought was going to be a funny British couples sitcom, but is not actually so sitcom, it turns out)
– hanging out with friends and just talking (but unfortunately, we don’t have a lot of joint friends right now, the way we did when we first met and were still in college / grad school)
– going out to theatre / movies
– eating out together
That’s kind of a short list! I suggested that he could take up gardening alongside me, but oddly, he didn’t seem super-enthused by the idea of helping me haul mulch for fun….
We were thinking of trying to take up bridge, but neither of us knows how to play, and I gather the typical thing to do is find your local bridge club, which will usually be patient with newbies learning, but Kevin would prefer to learn without leaving the house or talking to other people. This makes it a bit challenging!
It feels like there should be some kind of online bridge-learning thing, where you can sign up as a pair and play against either the computer or other people, but we haven’t found it yet — suggestions welcome.
In the meantime, though, we’re at least trying to do date night a bit more often. I have a bunch of gift cards gathered over several years that we’re going to try to finally use — this one was for Victory Italian in Oak Park. Pretty standard Italian, somewhat over-rich for our tastes, and a little pricey — I’m sorry, Victory, I’m not sure we’ll be coming back often, even if you are only three blocks from us.
But that said, they do give you this rich cheesy bread with marinara sauce when you sit down, which is honestly enough that I could have that with a glass of wine and it’d be a light meal for me, maybe with a small salad. And the portions are quite large — we brought most of my gnocchi home to Anand, and he ate it happily. And my Pim’s cocktail was nice.
So a pleasant hour out, and we walked through Mills Park on our way home, so it felt reasonably date-ish.
