Every time I leave Kauai, I’m a little sadder. This is a slightly worrisome trend. I’m not sure if there’s a way I can arrange my life to come back here regularly — it’s far, it’s expensive, I have commitments at home, etc. and so on. And yet.
There’s something about Kauai that is just…what I need right now, I guess. It’s as if I arrive here, and the whole island starts telling me to slow down. And in that slowdown is a release of tension, enough that I can set aside anxieties and just cope with things, like the Jump Space book I stopped working on a year ago. (I got a rough crit and kind of spiralled into anxiety and lack of confidence for quite a while.) I did a lot of work on it the last few days, made major progress. It’s good.
I just feel a little more calm here, a little more sane. According to my therapist, once I know how that feels, I can achieve that feeling anywhere. She’s very smart and I’m sure she’s right.
But it’s definitely a little easier in paradise!
Would I move here if I could? Maybe. It’s very isolated, and I think I might go a little stir-crazy if I actually lived here. On the other hand, average 78F weather with lots of ocean breezes and enough quiet that the writing part of my brain really unlocks — that might be worth a little stir-crazy. Well out of my budget, alas, so that’s one temptation I don’t need to struggle with.
I left Kauai yesterday and am in Honolulu now, prepping for the workshop I’m teaching at the university today, and the talk I’ll be giving tomorrow evening, resting my leg, and my arm — the arm muscle that was slowly getting better got worse again after pulling a suitcase and ukelele through the airports. Oops. Well, I’ll rest it for a few more days, hopefully it’ll make it home okay. Onwards.