Restless Dreams of Fantasy Lives

I had restless dreams last night, probably in part because I’m still coughing (feel mostly better, just a little more tired than usual, but the intermittent phlegmy cough is annoying, I should go see if we have any decongestant).

One of them was the standard “I could run a bookstore / cafe” fantasy, which I must sternly remind myself is actually a lot of work, and I’d have to quit half the stuff I do to make it even semi-viable, and then it’d still be a lot of work for years, until it was in a stable-enough position for employees to mostly run, if it ever got there. I have to have that stern talk with myself every few months.

But there was a new one, where I had a completely different writers’ life in Pakistan (or more likely, Sri Lanka).

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My fantasy life would look like this:

– wake up to the sound of the kites and other local birds, and the cool morning air

– have a simple breakfast of paratha and dal, with a bit of fruit and some cardamom chai

NOTE: in this fantasy, I am somehow making enough money (probably because I am being paid in US dollars and taking advantage of exchange rates) that I can afford a house assistant who will handle the basic daily cooking, so I only cook when I feel like it; they would also clean. I don’t mind picking up after just me, but if there’s anyone else around, it quickly starts eating significant time.

– go to my study (apparently I can afford to have a study) and write for a few hours while my mind is fresh

– I suppose I would need to spend some time in the late morning dealing with e-mail writing business, because that never goes away anymore.

– meet Kevin (oh, look, I guess I took him with me, that’s nice) for lunch of rice and curry; check in on our days

– one or two days a week, teach an early afternoon class. If I’m not teaching, spend that time on SLF / Serendib Press. (I’d really love to drop down to teaching one class a semester at some point — I’m not sure I ever want to completely stop teaching, because I do love it, but teaching less? That would be good.)

– mid-to-late afternoon, rest. Take it easy, read, maybe nap. It’s going to be hot for a while here. Or even better, go for a swim and then rest. Garden?

– dinner with Kevin most evenings, but occasionally meet up with writer / academic friends & colleagues for a meal. There are lots of non-rice-and-curry options available in both Pakistan and Sri Lanka (in the big cities, at least), but honestly, I think I’d be happy having rice and curry most meals.

– low-key, restful evenings; they tend to eat later in both countries, but I’d probably still want to be in bed by 10. I think I’m always going to be a lark, no matter where I live.

– on the weekends, explore textile and handicraft traditions in the area, experiment with them myself, do some shopping, try out a new cafe or restaurant…

It sounds nice, no?

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My life here in Chicago is pretty great (the birds woke me up with their cheeping here too; they’re just different birds, robins and cardinals and house sparrows), and would be even more great if I could get myself to slow down a little more, to something more like this pace.

But if I could be in Sri Lanka and have the ocean nearby, and have easy rice-and-curry meals made for me, and teach a little less….well, that sounds like a very lovely next-phase-of-life to daydream about.

Unlikely to happen; I think Kev and I will probably stay in Chicago. But maybe we’ll stop teaching at some point and be able to spend Dec – Feb in warmer climes? Hmm…

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Pictured: One of the beautiful shawls I bought in Pakistan; I really love this one. The patterning, the elegant colors, all the handwork that went into stitching around the tiny mirrors. It was $20 in the airport tourist shop, which I’m guessing means it would’ve been more like $10 if I’d bought it in Lahore.

(Dollars go a long way in Pakistan right now, which is not really a good thing — both Pakistan and Sri Lanka were hammered by COVID, and are having big economic problems now — but I can’t see that it helps them any for me to not spend my dollars there, alas. If anything, spending tourist money there probably does help, marginally.)

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Okay, time to shower and dress for campus and start working on my actual life tasks. 🙂

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