And then Anand woke up Wednesday night around midnight and came down to insist that Kavya wasn't there, and I was sure she was, but I went up with him, and yes, there she was, and he went placidly back to sleep and I was up for hours. Again. Too tired to work, but fretting about the things that were still to be done.
They're getting done, they are; despite my procrastination, I'm checking things off the list, and the list is actually getting smaller. But I'm not done yet. And the lack of sleep has made me so tired that I basically shut down at 5 p.m. and just wait for dinner and bedtime; luckily, Uncle Jed has been here to play with the kids and put them to bed. Uncle Jed is more fun than mommy anyway, and Anand is going to complain tonight when Uncle Jed is not here to play.
We see Kevin on Sunday. Three weeks with him away is do-able, but I think around two weeks it got to be a noticeable strain. Maybe that was the end of semester + holidays, though. Still, maybe until the kids are a bit older, we should try to keep our time away working to two weeks or less. I'm reconsidering that two-month Fulbright I'd planned to apply for. Maybe it's best to push it a few years down the road.
Tired just makes everything harder. I feel the cold more, and have to go and put on more clothes. I have a harder time making sensible food decisions (which I find is key during the stretch from Thanksgiving to Christmas) -- last night, I was too tired to do anything but order pizza. It sounded so good. And then I ate twice as many slices as I actually needed, and followed it up with a lemon truffle, because tired. (The lemon truffles, by the way, are the most successful of the sweets I've made so far, if by successful you mean incredibly-hard-to-resist. They are just so luscious.)
I've slept eight hours now, so hopefully today will be better. (Even though Jed is leaving, boo.) Plan for the day -- finish up backlogged Jaggery stuff. Finish up backlogged BVC stuff. Finish up backlogged UIC stuff (just one small task left, I think). If I can just FOCUS and get those done today, then I will be much less stressed.
Then drive Jed to the airport. (He would take a cab, but this way, I get another twenty minutes with him, and maybe we can sing Christmas carols in the car.) Get groceries for Saturday's Christmas party. Finish Kavi's hat -- I've been too tired even to knit the last few days, which is sad. Rest. Bake things. Clean the pantry. Start the actual holiday part of this holiday. That would be good.
I should note that it's not that there's been no fun. There has been fun. Yesterday we even picked Kavi up from school and took her to see Frozen, which was wonderful. (I think it was the right decision not to take Anand, though I waffled on that -- I think he would have gotten too scared. Despite his enjoyment of Angry Birds fighting, genuinely scary things are too scary for him still. It's weird.) I've just hit the point when the looming to-do list is interfering with the having fun. Best to just buckle down, knock it out, and be done.
But first, tea.