Not beating-myself-up crap -- I was too harried and exhausted to even worry about that. But physically miserable; so incredibly tired that I was dragging myself everywhere, despite sleeping more than eight hours a night. Sick-to-my-stomach often. (Typically within half an hour of eating the white food / sugar / etc., but also more carsick on my commute than I have been in months.) It feels pretty clear that this food and my body do not agree with each other. So I'm now left with the question of how did it happen? I'd been pretty disciplined for a month and a half, so why did it just fall apart?
I think there were three aspects to it.
1) I was busy enough that I didn't plan well to have healthy food options around, so when I got hungry, I had few choices available, so I just ate what was there.
2) I was working hard enough on academic stuff that it used up a lot of discipline / willpower, leaving me almost nothing leftover for health discipline.
3) We had a bunch of yummy-looking food in the house leftover from the party, and I am a bit pathological about not wasting food. I should have frozen it (white bread), put it on a high shelf (chocolates), or just thrown it away (leftover cake). But I didn't do any of those things, and so I ate it all. ALL.
I'm back to discipline today, hopefully. I need to go buy some multigrain bread and others healthy stapes this weekend. I'm working 'til late on campus, so I'm going to have to get lunch and dinner out; I'll try to pick places where I can find healthy options. Mostly, I think having the right food in my house is key for making this work, though.
Laura, I owe you $25, as I have lost our bet spectacularly. Wanna go out for brown rice sushi and sashimi sometime? :-)
P.S. There was also something of a vicious cycle that kicked in. Eat junk, feel like crap, get exhausted, too tired to go shop for healthy food, open fridge, stare at what's there, take the easy / comforting food option, feel like crap, rinse and repeat. It got harder and harder to eat well as I went along.