I don't mind seeing the Halloween parade myself, if I happen to be free. But I definitely don't want to move work in order to attend. I went on one field-trip, and was a) bored, b) ill, c) wondering why the hell I'd agreed to do this (I think because it involved going on a boat, and admittedly, that part was fun). I don't bother with preschool conferences; I see their teachers every day at either drop-off or pick-up, and I assume they'd tell me if something were really wrong.
And while admittedly, I can enjoy the performative / competitive aspect of bringing the most impressive homemade food to the school potluck event, it a) feels a little ridiculous to care, and b) probably shouldn't be allowed to get in the way of work. I can be performative / competitive with my actual friends at my own parties, rather than for barely-known parents of other kids in my kid's class, if I'm really feeling the need to reaffirm my domestic skills.
(We did go to kindergarten conferences, because she takes the bus to school and we don't see her teacher regularly, but even that felt less necessary, given that her (young and enthusiastic) teacher a) sends home weekly behavior reports, b) e-mails home weekly class activity reports, c) e-mails frequently for anything out of the ordinary (such as a child having a bathroom accident). It's kind of amazing how communicative she is, actually. I'm putting it down to this being her first year as a teacher; I'm guessing she'll ease up a bit as time goes on.)