It's not exactly a New Year's resolution as such, but I do want to get into better shape this year. Thanksgiving + Christmas + being away from home for a month landed me with five new pounds that I really have no use for. And in general, I'm pretty damn tired of being overweight, of always having the consciousness of it, if that makes any sense. And there's no good reason for it -- I gained most of this weight back in college, before I had my thyroid condition diagnosed; once I started taking replacement thyroid hormone, I rarely gained weight -- I just didn't lose any. So, a set of goals: lose ten pounds soon, lose thirty pounds total by the end of the year.
I know, thirty pounds sounds like a lot, but that'll only take me to 120, which for a 5'0" woman, is actually still on the high end of a normal weight range. It's what will make my doctor happy, and make her stop telling me I'm overweight. That'd be nice, for all sorts of reasons. My dad (a doctor) sat me down this Thanksgiving and gave me a stern-ish talk about not being overweight anymore, because I was getting old enough that it would soon be a risk for developing diabetes, like my grandfather. I so do not want to stick a bunch of needles into me every day! So, the goal.
I'm going to need some help with that goal, though. I have a gym membership -- I could theoretically go every day. Working at home, it's not as if I don't have the time. But did I mention that it's cold outside? 20 degrees yesterday. That's a powerful disincentive not to take a 20-minute walk to the gym. Cold. I hate the production of winter, the piling on of the sweatshirt, the heavy coat, the scarf, gloves, hat, and when you walk outside, your face is still cold when that wind comes off the lake, and eventually your ears start to hurt. So am I going to go to the gym every day, or even every other day, on my own? Not likely.
I was talking all this over with Kevin last night (talking = complaining/fretting) and he suggested a personal trainer might help. Now, that isn't cheap. The cheapest one my gym has is $60/session. Which seems like an awful lot of money to me. Kev thinks we can afford for me to have a session a week; we'll crunch some numbers later today when we pay bills and confirm that. Might have to skip eating out for a while, but I suppose that can only help with the goal, 'cause when you're at a nice Italian restaurant, how can you resist the gnocchi in a tomato-cream sauce? :-) (The worst part about trying to lose weight isn't being hungry, or tired from working out -- it's thinking about food all the damn time. Drives me crazy.) Somehow personal trainers strike me as kind of goofy, but even if I just do a couple of sessions with one, enough to develop a good regimen, that might be really helpful.
Anyway, we'll think about it some more, see how it goes. But I gotta say, I like having a sweetie who a) doesn't care for himself whether I lose weight or not, and b) who supports me when I decide I want to. His other suggestion, to make it easier to do portion control, was that the next time I made up a big batch of curry, he'd measure the ingredients, figure out the calorie counts, and then help me divide the curry up into little ziploc bags (for freezing) that were of an appropriate size for dinner. Which would hopefullly keep me from doing things like going through half a loaf of bread and an equivalent amount of curry, just because they tasted oh, so good together. I do that sometimes. The ziploc thing is kind of silly, but it might actually help.
Gosh, it'd be nice to be at MLA next Christmas, on that job market, with actual interviews, and feel like I looked decent. I swear, interview people think you're dumber if you're chubby. Especially if you're young and chubby. Sad, but true.