So, you may remember that sometime in spring I started seeing a psychologist. The proximate cause of going was to see whether an ADHD diagnosis might be appropriate.
We did a couple therapy sessions and then she said that she’d be willing to recommend a full testing assessment for me, which I have only now gotten around to scheduling. It’s going to be three 3-hr sessions of testing, which should be covered by my HMO insurance, which means probably a $20 co-pay / hr, so $180 total. Something like that? Will report back with the verdict after the testing; am quite curious.
I saw her weekly for about a month, talking through some of the cancer / work anxiety / family stuff / etc., then switched to biweekly, because I was running out of things to talk about. I’m basically pretty happy these days. At today’s session, we agreed that I’d check back in at the start of August, see if I wanted to continue sessions or not. It was good, talking to a competent stranger about all that, getting a check on my take on things from someone unbiased.
She was most useful, I think, in the interpersonal dynamics aspect, helping me see how other people might be thinking about things, and where I was putting a little too much of my own view of the world on them, if that makes sense. My view of the world is maybe a little more idiosyncratic than most, but I suspect that in general, that’s something we’re all subject to. Interesting to think about.
Another thing I started doing this year was meditation. I signed up for the app, and did daily meditation for a month. That was really useful, I think, in that it got me to a point, after a month, where I could very quickly feel when I was getting into a stressed-out, unproductive headspace.
Sometimes I actually meditate to pull out of it, often I just switch tasks, take a walk, etc. But it helped me ‘tune in’ to what was going on in my subconscious, which is actually a pretty cool result for 10 minutes / day for a month. I wish we had this as a default part of the elementary school curriculum, because I think we could all use it. Maybe if I run for school board. Although it’s probably simpler just to suggest it to the D97 board or staff…and I bet there’s some stuff like this built into the Second Step curriculum they’re already doing.
Today I scheduled Anand to start therapy, after we get back from California (visiting the in-laws for the second half of July). I’m hoping it’ll help with his new habit of perseverating — when something bad happens, out comes a litany of everything bad that’s happened to him in the last month, and he remembers it all in excruciating detail, poor munchkin. The card game that went awry when someone didn’t play fair, the camp counsellor who wouldn’t let him out of the baby end of the pool, etc. and so on. Hoping they can give him some tools to be able to switch out of that mindset. Also I think it’ll just be good for him to have another adult to listen and validate his emotions, someone who isn’t his parent.
I suspect that if I do keep seeing my therapist, we’ll mostly be talking about parenting strategies. Sometimes it’s bewildering, when Anand is behaving in a way that is so unlike anything I would ever do, and I really am not sure how best to support and help him. Again, wish this sort of help was available to everyone.
Universal healthcare now, please. Raise my taxes if you have to (though if you can tax the billionaires first, that’d be good). And if we include massage therapy as part of it, that would be very nice.
What would a truly healthy, happy society look like?