I just finished reading…

I just finished reading Diaz's Drown, and in this moment, I am ragingly jealous of Diaz's success. Why didn't I sell any of the Bodies in Motion stories to prestigious literary magazines? Why didn't I properly try? Some of those stories are damn good, I'm pretty sure.

Given the awesome reviews that I did get, in major venues, why were American sales so disappointing? More importantly, why have I failed to write a big press-publishable book since? Why have I failed to write and publish even a single story in a lit mag sort of venue since? Why have I barely sent any out in the last eight years? What the hell do I think I'm doing with myself?

This madness will pass, I know, and really, I don't spend a lot of time comparing my publishing success to that of other writers, except perhaps Jhumpa Lahiri, my nemesis. Every once in a while, you'll have to allow me a moment of utter blazing fury. Mostly directed at myself. I'm going to go bang my head against a wall now. Never mind me.

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